How Not To Clean Up Vomit

Okay, what is it about Christmas and stomach bugs? Poor toddler Georgia had it Monday, I was striken Wednesday and Thursday, and apparently, today it's 8-year-old Lila's turn. Bless her heart, she managed to hit the hardwood floor and miss the large leather purse that was hanging on the bedpost, but what, in my 4am stupor, did I grab for cleanup? Clorox Disinfecting Wipes.

Not a bad choice, you say? Perhaps not -- if I had chosen a scent other than lemon!! Ack! Even the thought makes me queasy right now! But fear not -- I never present a problem without a solution. When both Bob and I were about to hurl in sympathy ourselves, I grabbed a jar of Vick's Vapour Rub and smeared it on our necks. Like smelling salts of old, we recovered!

In other news, the One Hot Mama store is open and it is fabulous! Please come visit and then spread the word on yelp, citypages, superpages, wherever you and your opinions roam! (Yes, for those of you with synapses firing on all cylinders, I left my sick pumpkin at home with my Fairy Godmother, aka my Mum).

Three more shopping days, but more importantly, that many wrapping days!

Thank Goodness for Grandmothers

They're definitely not the grandmas of yesteryear -- my mother and mother-in-law are both stereotype-defying, very hot chicks -- but without them, I'd be toast. This is what people mean when they say "it takes a village" -- extended family is a big part of that community. Today is our first day with a store that needs to be open at the promised time, and I was going to bring the girls, aka the whirling dervishes, in with me. Hey, it's not like I have a choice! But my mom called and tactfully pointed out the futility of that plan, and is coming over to watch them play at home for a few hours!

Saving my butt again, just like when she flew in to take care of me when I was put on bedrest for SIX weeks (before the internet, people!) while pregnant with my son, and again after my daughter was born and I began hemorraging from over-activity postpartum.

Take a moment to thank your mom today -- you never know when she'll be there for you!

It's Like Giving Birth Again!

Well, okay, only sort of. But the anticipation, the very hard work and the feeling of not knowing if you'll make it are all the same -- the new One Hot Mama store opens on Monday, December 15th!!

The new, sexy, adorable, comfortable store will be right down from the California Pizza Kitchen in the California Pavilion at Laurelgrove, and we can’t wait for you to visit. Shopping couldn’t be easier. Valet park in the garage on Laurelgrove, and we’ll validate your ticket. Take the elevator to the second floor, and check out the goodies that arrive almost daily. We have toys to entertain your little ones while you shop, and if you forget the wipes, we have them on hand! Afterwards, nosh at CPK or get massaged at The Massage Company or do what I do, which is to enjoy some Coldstone ice cream. We’re open weekdays from 10 (after preschool drop-off) to 7, Saturdays noon to 7, and Sundays noon to 5. If I’m not there to help you, my mom Christene will be. Our bestselling item right now is the amazing Belly Bandit postpartum belly wrap, and we have tons of fab outfits to make holiday travel and entertaining easier. Come check it out!

One Hot Mama
12265 Ventura Boulevard, #203
Studio City, CA 91604
818-980-9812
800-217-3750

And for online shopping, we’re still at http://www.onehotmama.com. Pictures soon!

The. Best. Idea. Ever.

In the "why didn't I think of this?" category -- actually, probably did think of it, but was too sleep-deprived and whiny to do anything about it.

NuMamaSpa -- saw it on Daily Candy today, and just had to let you know. If you're in LA, book early and often, and if you're not, write the mommy-daddy creators behind the idea and tell them they're geniuses. (Maybe you can prevail on them to travel to you!)

The thought of a stress-free massage is enough to sustain me for the day. :)

Motherhood is a Marathon

When people talk about "bouncing back" from having a baby (as I did, so many years ago, after having just one) I have to laugh. Out loud. I am, just now, in 2008, bouncing back. Or starting to. From the marathon that started with my first son's birth on July 15, 1997 (yes, in the last century!) and continues to this day.

No, I'm not whining about the gig (another day, another post, perhaps) but I want to remind anyone who's questioning their seeming lack of ambition or ability after becoming a mom (or becoming one again) that they aren't nuts. I remember my manager, Sara, telling me that she knew people who hadn't changed their life a bit after having children, and that she didn't like those people all that much. (At the time, she may have been commiserating with me over being dumped by my agent!)

My son is now 11, my daughter 8 and the surprise twin girls are 3 1/2 -- and only now am I back at work as an actress (for a laugh, check out my imdb page and play Spot The Pregnancy/Birth Hiatuses) and at our really fun site for moms from the first trimester to the fourth, One Hot Mama. We are opening a store (in this economy!) next week, and I literally did not have a spare moment of brain power, or, more importantly, psychic energy to devote to such a venture for the past four years. To be fair, I did have twins on the last go-around, but I reallly feel that people are more willing to cut you slack with multiples. And, more to point, I was more willing to do that for myself.

So whether you've just had a baby and are wondering what comes next, or you are on your fourth and the youngest starts kindergarten in the fall -- pace yourself. Stay the course. Whatever you're doing right now is just where you need to be. If you're truly miserable, change something up. But please, do not beat up on yourself for not doing anything. We're in this for the long haul, and there are no grades. You are the best mother for your child.

Have a great day, and a sleep-filled night!

What Not To Do In A Recession

Open a store, that's what!! Yeah, but Bob and I are bound together by our total contrarian natures, so we've put all our eggs in the One Hot Mama basket and are working round the clock to have our One Hot Mama maternity and nursingwear store open by December 15th in Studio City, California! So if you're pregnant or nursing and need something to wear for the holidays, don't despair. We're going to be two doors down from California Pizza Kitchen on Ventura, and we can't wait to meet you. If you live in LA and want a gift certificate for use at the store as my thank you for reading this blog, please be sure to comment and include your email address so I can send it to you. Have a great day!

Quick Thoughts

1. I am so grateful to have my amazing husband as my partner in life and business.

2. Today, One Hot Mama signed a lease and will officially open a real store in Studio City, California within the next two weeks (now you know why thought number 1 occurred to me!)

3. We're all real women. I just read a cool article about another female entrepreneur with a clothing line, a website and a store, and I went to her site so I could send her my regards, and was met by a banner saying something to the effect of, "clothing for real women" --in sizes 14 to 26. Now, I get that she's meeting a need, but do you need to slam other chicks to do it? Do we say, One Hot Mama, clothes for real women who've used their uteruses? Ugh. No. You can serve your community without claiming it's the only real way to be.

4. Cool sales around LA this weekend, including my friend Suzie's amazing sample sale of Burgundy Blue kids' clothing. A bit of a trek to downtown, but cool and should be worth it.

Sunday December 7th
noon until 6:00pm
Burgundy Blue: SAMPLE SALE*funky fashions for babies and toddlers
1250 Long Beach Ave STUDIO 309
LA,CA 90021
213.448.0503
**conveniently located one block from the 10 Freeway, at Alameda
also near the 5, 110, and 101 Freeways

Big Sale at One Hot Mama -- Black Friday Online

So, we're in the midst of working on an actual One Hot Mama store (yippee for chicks looking for hip, hot, cool maternity and nursing clothes -- a bit scary for those of us who are going to work in it 80 hours a week!) and we've decided to participate in the big retail sale-a-thon by having a 25% off EVERYTHING sale at One Hot Mama. That's everything -- slings, Bravado nursing bras, Belly Bandits, Japanese Weekend and Olian tops and dresses, the Perfect Pre- and Postpartum pant and more.

Pretty cool stuff. Stay tuned for news of a store opening!

Win a Balboa Baby Sling!

Now that I'm really full-time back at our business (after a long "vacation" to give birth to and raise twins to preschool age!) I really appreciate other business owners who are parents -- we are a hardy breed. When we're not breaking down, that is. :)

So I love The Mogul Mom -- lots of great insights for those of us with an extra demanding kid known as our own business. Check her out, and while you're there, you can post a comment and win a Balboa Baby Sling. Cool, no? Cool, yes.

And look for really cool news for SoCal hot mamas -- coming soon!

Thanksgiving Travel With A Breastfeeding Baby

God bless all of you who are traveling with infants and small children for this holiday -- I am not in that group of brave souls. Don't get me wrong. I'll travel anywhere with my kids, and have. Even as the sole adult. But to do it when the rest of the free world is on the road just adds a bit too much stress for me to handle. Gotta know your limits!

That's not to say that you won't have a great time, but in case you're a little nervous about either the trip or the destination (at some point, your baby will need to eat in front of a roomful of relatives, here are some random thoughts:

• Assume that some boob (pun intended) will have a bit too much wine and say something totally inappropriate about breasts and/or breastfeeding. Maybe that's just my family -- but in case it happens to you, a beatific smile is always handy. Feel free to think bad thoughts on the inside. The other option is to say that yes, you hope to wean soon, so that your breasts can go back the work nature intended, selling beer.
• Nursing on a plane will save you from (most of) the screaming that babies seem conditioned to do in aircraft. Of course, since you're crammed in like sardines, you may be next to someone who doesn't appreciate your fine mothering skills. And, if you're in first class, be prepared to be next to Barbara Walters or someone else who thinks nursing makes them "uncomfortable."
• Both of the above situations will be abated if you just remind yourself what a good mom you are. And that you have a right to be in the room (or, in the first case, the plane). If those fail, read about other people's reactions here and keep some funnies in mind from Breastfeeding.com here.
• (By the way, if you have miles, use them for upgrades now before baby needs his own ticket!)
• Use a sling, both for travel and for family gatherings. Keeps all those germy hands and curious eyes away. And yes, I apologize for all the mothers of older kids who look just like petri dishes to you and who want to touch the baby. Remind them that stroking the top of a baby's head gently feels just great. And if they touch his little hands, smack 'em! (Just kidding.)
• Lastly, dress appropriately. Meaning, you don't need to disrobe to feed a crying infant. Here is a fabulous new shirt from Japanese Weekend, but we have lots more!

Have a great trip!

Finished With Your Sling? Pass It On!

Here's something good you can do to celebrate World Babywearing Week (who knew?) -- donate a sling to the good folks over at the Peppermint Baby Boutique.

Send them to:

Peppermint Baby Boutique
Attn: Sling Drive
1778 N. Plano Rd., Suite 100
Richardson, TX 75081

I always feel odd putting my nursing clothes and slings in the Goodwill pile; I know that whoever discovers them and knows what they are will be psyched, but I worry that the volunteer sorters will be like, "what up with the clothes with holes in the boobie area?" I try to pass such goodies on to friends, but once you're kids are nearing junior high (my eldest son), the moms stop making so many babies. (Not me, apparently!) :)

Motrin and Babywearing -- I Need an Advil!

Wow. Talk about misreading the market. Have you seen the latest (now pulled) Motrin ad that is pretty snarky about wearing one's baby? I know some people got deeply offended, but I just have to laugh at how stupid the copywriters (and the Motrin folks responsible for saying yes and writing the cheque) are.

• First, they couldn't be more snippy about babywearing being fashionable. Yeah, those indigenous peoples who did it hundreds of years ago were all about The Next Big Thing.
• Second, even if it is fashionable, the point is to actually bond better, make breastfeeding easier, and to to have your child be integrated into your life, rather than hauling them around in a plastic bucket (aka infant car seat).
• Lastly, it's not supposed to hurt! Pain is an indication that you're doing it wrong. This applies to other areas as well (ahem).

Now, the ad was pretty funny, but it had oodles of misinformation. Using slings was such a blessing so that I could eat a freakin' sandwhich while taking care of a newborn. Even wore the twins at the same time, which is, in a weird way, easier because of the counter-balanced weight. I know that a simple adjustment by someone who knew what they were doing (pulled the ring back so it sat just in front of my shoulder bone) changed the experience of using a sling completely!

But my point (originally, anyway) is that you shouldn't let self-righteous people who think their parenting method (breastfeeding, Ferberizing, babywearing, spanking on demand, whatever) entitles them to be snotty dissuade you from trying out said method. Okay, except for the spanking on demand one. I made that up. Based on what my parents did (kidding mom!). I get that the ad made fun of the "I'm a better mother than you are" crowd, but you know what? A lot of what we imagine as other mothers looking down their noses at us is just our own personal insecurity. They are probably pretty well occupied with snot running down someone's nose, strange rashes on backsides and the constant surfeit of sleep.

So let's cut everyone a little slack, girls.

Happy birthday to me, today! :)

Miscellany

Quick thoughts:

I bought a Belly Bandit for myself and wore it on Thursday. Oh. My. God. What was the best part -- hard to choose, between the improved posture, better positioning of the boobies I have left, having an assist in keeping my stomach held in. But the best may have been the reduced fatigue on my back.

We have so much fabulous stuff -- more clothes arrive every day. It's really making me think -- just think, mind you -- about opening a store. Any thoughts -- besides Are you nuts? And, What took you so long?

Happy weekend -- now that you're parenting -- no longer a relaxing part of your week!!

Two Cool For School

I am so excited about two of our newest offerings that they are already in my closet! And remember, my youngest children are three years old, and I am not having any more! What is so fab that it has induced such glee?

First, the Belly Bandit, a way to tighten and shrink your tummy post pregnancy. Yes, even three years later! (Okay, let me apologize for the excessive italics -- I'm just so psyched!) Like a corset, but way easier to get on. See the cartoon on the left for how to do it. I swear, this thing is magic -- or at least, feels like it. And it's under 40 bucks. Cool.

The other item that is making me happy these days is really two items -- cover ups to wear over those very useful, but sometimes kinda boring, nursing bra tanks and spaghetti strap maternity camis. These two wraps, the Tattoo You (pictured on the right) and the Funkytown, are fun, hip, and keep your arms covered now that it's a bit chilly. Or now that your arms aren't so buff. Either one. :)

Have a great day, and remember, you are One Hot Mama. Spread the word!

Natural Birth of Twins!

I have been meaning to start a conversation about birth in general, and twins in particular. I have had three of my four children drug free; the first birth ended with an epidural after 12 hours (during which I should have been at home, ignoring what were very early signs of labour). I've been asked many times why one would choose to labour naturally, and honestly, I have to say that, in some bizarre way, it's easier. I (being a major control freak) would just rather choose to be aware and present and deal with what is actually going on with my body -- the whole needle-being-put-into-my-spine thing didn't really inspire confidence for me.

Here goes the Readers Digest version of what I did to facilitate my desired vaginal birth of twins (I had two other children and no time to recover from surgery; I knew natural would make returning to my older kids easier):

• Barbara Luke's twin book and Elizabeth Noble's twin book both had info on the importance of natural birth and some links and stories that were helpful.
• I gained twenty pounds by twenty weeks of pregnancy (not as easy or as fun as it sounds -- I had to work really hard, as my single pregnancies totalled 25 pounds max!)
• I think Mothering Multiples (or one of the previously mentioned books) had a section with affirmations I said every day -- like, "my babies are born naturally weighing over 6 pounds each after April 1st" (I needed it to be that date or after in order for my higher-grade insurance to kick in!).
• I wrote to people online in natural birth groups (try babycenter.com), looking for support. Only got back stories about people who had one baby vaginally and a c-section for the second. NOT what I wanted at all! ONE lady wrote with a link to a site that had several stories of natural solo homebirths of undiagnosed twins. If I had printed it out on paper, it would be in tatters, because I read it nightly and about twenty times during early labour, rocking back and forth on my giant birth ball.
• Another inspiration twin birth collection that I perused is here.
• I did yoga weekly (Kundalilni) and swam at the Y every other day or so.
• I told the babies "head down, back to belly, easy out" every day. Out loud.
• I told April (baby B) that she couldn't just hang out after Georgia was born, that there would be a lot of space and it would seem like fun, but that if she didn't engage right away, the doctor might not let her come out naturally. In fact, after Georgia's birth, I grabbed April's butt so that she couldn't flip.

I was also overdue (they ended up being born a couple hours shy of 39 weeks) and fighting induction, so I did permit my doctor to artificially rupture my membranes, or break my water. I had agreed to an epidural catheter in case of emergency, but we never ended up putting it in. More on the actual birth later!

I Love to Shop For Maternity Clothes

How sad is that? My youngest kids are three years old, for heaven's sake. But the truth is, I just love clothes. Not in a too-much-stuff-hidden-in-the-closet-with-tags-still-on way, more like a isn't-it-marvelous-how-many-ways-there-are-to-make-a-shirt? way. Since we can only wear so many clothes at a time (we actually wear around 10% of the clothes we own) I get my jollies by shopping for maternity clothes that we're going to carry at One Hot Mama. And, since I feel my mission is to make all mothers feel and look good, I try to find clothes that aren't really maternity clothes, but will look good on you, pregnant or not. That way, there are always a couple pieces that make their way into my closet. :)

If you follow the link above, you'll get great tips for cleaning out your closet, which is something we especially need to do when we (a) get pregnant (b) have had a baby (c) have stopped having babies -- in other words, all the times our bodies change. I used to look fabulous in deep vee neckline tops -- that is, I did when I still had boobs. Now, after four kids, not so much. It pains me to toss (recycle) them, but I must face facts and switch to high-necked, low-backed tops that show off my sexy, curvy ... shoulders. Just because something is pretty, doesn't mean it's pretty on you. Proof? Michelle Obama's victory rally black-and-red Narciso Rodriguez abomination of a dress -- 77% of respondents in one poll said ditch it! Now that's what I call bipartisan support!

Where was I? Oh, yes. Shopping! My poor husband Bob will be up all night tonight and the next two days, publishing all the cute stuff i got to our website, but I'll give you the head's up now -- fabulous wrap tee-shirt cardigans that you can wear open or tied, lots of comfy nursing pyjamas, pretty dual-purpose maternity and nursing tops, some basic and beautiful maternity tees (without the goofy sayings -- I mean, I know those make funny shower gifts, but since you feel as large as a billboard, do you really want to dress like one?), hot yoga pants and the greatest maternity foundation garments (am I dating myself?) ever. So keep visiting us at One Hot Mama for some great shopping for hot mamas.

Hear One Hot Mama on the Radio

I spent some time Sunday afternoon with the hysterical Maureen Muldoon and her crew over at LA Talk Radio, doing an online radio show. Check out the interview by following this link, scrolling to bottom and pressing play (or download). The One Hot Mama segment was followed by the hysterical authors of The Stay At Home Martyr, one of whom is a mom at my kids' school. It's a small, funny, world. :)

Happy Halloween!!

Best part of having a baby during Halloween? You get to pick what adorable little outfit you want to put them in. Enjoy it now, because in three years, it's all over. My twins are 3, and this year, announced their desire to be a blue cat (not available in stores) and a rainbow. That's right. A rainbow. Definitely not available in stores -- off to hot glue ribbons to styrofoam.

Enjoy (oh, and if you're preggers, wear a t-shirt with a hole cut in it and paint your belly. Jack-O-Lantern, Aquarium, Earth -- the possibilities are endless!)

Ah, Holiday Travel With Baby

I know that Thanksgiving is the biggest travel holiday in the US, but not for this family. I'm going on strike and never traveling during peak times again! ;) Not with four kids, anyway. Now, lest you think I parked myself in front of the tv once I became a parent, au contraire! I have traveled as far as St. Petersburg, Russia (with a 1-year old), alone with infant twins and most recently from LAX to Wyoming with the four by myself, so I know what works and what doesn't. For those of you who are braving the friendly skies for the first time with kiddies, I'll confine myself to tips for the under-3 set, since I just provide the older ones with a game boy and call it a day!

• My two secret weapons with kids under two was always those tiny bottles of bubbles (get the party favor size). They are a great distraction for the baby or toddler, and I find that they cheer the people around you up as well (who can be cranky to be seated near kids -- go figure). I also used to carry California Baby Aromatherapy spray in the Overtired and Cranky formulation, but now that we have those liquid limitations, I don't know if you can do that anymore.
• Use a sling. That way, you can schlep your baby (these work up to 36 pounds, so you can carry most toddlers) and they'll feel cozy and safe in your arms while you have a hand free for your passport and ticket. I could not have survived without a baby sling. My two faves are the Balboa Baby slings and the Over The Shoulder Baby Holder. I even have used two slings to carry my twin babies bandolier style. With a sling, your hands are free to use the phone or eat, while nursing or cuddling -- very key! And it can multi-task as a changing pad, pillow and extra blanket.
• Not a sling person? Give the Ultimate Baby Wrap a try -- easier than schlepping a car seat and travel system through the airport. Check those in your luggage and go hands (relatively) free.
• The very best travel companion for a baby? Your breasts (sorry, no photo handy!!) ;) Nursing during takeoff and landing is better than chewing gum, and for the toothless set, it's the only option. There's less likelihood that a flight delay will precipitate a feeding crisis (milk is always on hand, the right temp and ready to serve) and it calms many a fussy baby.
• In case Barbara Walters or someone just as baby-unfriendly is next to you, use the sling for privacy and wear a nursing shirt for extra discretion. I would have been sunk without nursing clothes. Not shilling any particular style, but even though I know breastfeeding in public is legal in all states, I felt less like a side show with my mammaries covered up! Tossing a nursing tank, for example, under a jacket gave me coverage and access on planes, cruises and trains. But any nursing shirt will help with too-close seatmates. And don't let them intimidate you -- they were babies once!

A happy baby is a quiet(er) baby, and if people aren't throwing you nasty looks, your trip is likely to go easier. I actually flew with my 1-year old back from Milan, and we were delayed THREE HOURS on the tarmac before taking off, and I kept Cameron occupied the entire time (he was still nursing, and I had my bubbles and other toys in my bag of tricks). At the end of the flight, my seat mate called his wife and said that sitting next to us had calmed his fears about having a baby (he was a big traveler).

Of course, it's not always that smooth! Good thing that guy missed the next flight we were on!

Are You Wearing Mom Jeans?

Found this article that I just had to share. Too funny. I guess every generation will have its mom jeans -- perhaps, in fifteen years, the low-rise, bootcut pants we swear by will peg you as a mom.

My girlfriend, Anita and I used to have a version of this we called "Wedding Face." If the last time you had your makeup done was your wedding and you really really liked it and you haven't changed it since, and your wedding was not in the past three years, this could be you. (A corollary is Prom Face.)

Why is this bad? Because times change, and if you are still lining your lips in brown eyebrow pencil and drawing on uber brows, your Wedding Face is about fifteen years old. I was talking with another actress/mommy about this the other day -- without my periodic work as an actor, I would still have Wedding Face, but luckily, I get to see current makeup trends in the makeup chair. What to do if you're not around current fashion and its practitioners? Head to the mall. Someone will play with your face for free. You don't have to buy everything they show you. I had a period when I hadn't worked for a while, and looking at a magazine, I could tell that faces were starting to look really different. So my sister in law, two friends and I found a makeup artist to give us a lesson. Fun and educational! Yeah, I'm shallow.

The Mom Jeans solution? Same mall, but take along a stroller that will fit in a dressing room and try on things that look really new and out there to you. Remember, your body's changed, so you might be surprised at the shapes that flatter you now.

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Why People Are Against Nursing In Public & Plastic Surgery

Say what? How are these two topics even related? I was with a bunch of pregnant moms on a cruise Sunday (lots of fun, and it made me nostalgic for being pregnant -- man, I am a sucker for babies!) and we started talking about nursing. I was telling them that, until I had my first baby, I had only seen one person breastfeed. We were in a restaurant and this woman whipped out the largest single breast I'd ever seen in real life, and spent a good five minutes maneuvering it into her infant's teensy mouth while my girlfriend and I watched in horror.

Now, of course, I know that the baby was pretty close to newborn and probably needed a little help with his latch. Do I think that we all needed to see her entire boob? No -- I'm a big proponent of Mohammed going to the mountain, and not hauling out the mountain for Mohammed, and all, to see. But I realize something else, as well. I noticed her precisely because she was so indiscreet -- and, if I remember correctly, the poor baby was crying. I never noticed all the mothers I may have encountered nursing quietly.

Which brings me to plastic surgery. I rail against the likes of Jocelyn Wildenstein, the premier example of bad plastic surgery on the face, and various strippers and A/M/W* types with pneumatic breasts that look ready to explode on contact, but as my husband pointed out the other day, there are lots of people who've had facelifts and breast augmentations that I don't notice. When we only see the bad examples, we tend to be scared of the whole, but the truth is that have pretty much spent ten years nursing, and the only person who ever caught a glimpse of my aereola (for some reason, the body part that separates good cleavage from indecent exposure), was a zealous admirer who leaned right into the sling where my baby was nuzzled to say, "let me see her sleep!" only to be met by said infant nursing away.

What to do if you're pregnant and trying to figure out how to nurse in public, or if you have a newborn, how do you find good examples to emulate? Head to a local La Leche League meeting -- yeah, you're sure to find people showing it all (it's a roomful of women, after all) but if you watch carefully, you can catch quite a few moms who are really good at the subtle latch. Even without nursing clothes. But those help, too.

Let's hope, as I age, that I'm as discreet with my plastic surgery as I was with my nursing! :)

*A/M/W = Actress/Model/Whatever, a major proportion of the female population of Los Angeles between the ages of 21 and 35

How Lucky Are You to be Pregnant Right Now

This week, Bob and I attended a maternity and nursingwear trade show in Los Angeles. Wow, what a way the world has changed! When we started One Hot Mama over ten year ago, there were only a couple companies even making nursingwear. And their stuff was fugly! That's why, when we started out, I designed everything. But now, there are so many fabulous choices -- especially in maternity wear -- that we are having a hard time deciding what to carry.

And don't get me started on accessories -- I can't decide between the cool product that will turn your regular purse into a diaper bag and sweet-as-pie baby-butt-casting kit. Coming soon to One Hot Mama!

Where Was I This Week?

Good question ... just filming a little part on Hannah Montana. Yep, maybe now my kids will look up to me. :) For those who haven't visited the About Us page at onehotmama.com, I've been a professional actress for years, and my advice to other actresses wondering whether or not to delay having a family (because, often, the years you work the most happen to be prime childbearing years) is to go for it. I went overboard, of course, with four children, but the beauty of being part of the tribe of nomads known as performers is that work ebbs and flows, and having a family makes those ups and down not matter at all.

Live your life.

Who Is One Hot Mama?

Maybe you are, if you're reading this. But maybe what you want to know is who the heck is this blogger/store owner chick? Maybe you want to know a little bit more about us before plonking down your hard-earned cash (or credit) on some hot maternity clothes or cool nursingwear. I hear you. Here's all the information about our family you could ever hope to have! (And more, actually!)

Enjoy the You Tube clips of our Bringing Home Baby episode, the only one, so far as I know, to feature naturally birthed, exclusively breastfed, cloth-diapered twins.

The Worst New Baby Gift Ever

Hopefully, by confessing I will be forgiven:

When I was but 23 years old, a friend had a baby. She was the first in our group of randomly employed actor/poets to do so, and she had gained a good 70 pounds with the pregnancy. She was not married to the baby's father, and their relationship was tenuous. While she was still in the hospital, I thought it would be brilliant and supportive to gift her with ... a negligee, in her previous size, from Victoria's Secret!!! I may even have said something to the effect of, "so you can get back to being your sexy self!"

May God forgive me. I knew not what I did. Now, of course, I could give her something loose and billowy from our selection of nursing pajamas and nightgowns, but a teddy? Ack!

Feel free to add any horrendous post-baby gift stories. But I doubt they'll top this one.

Angelina Jolie Is One Hot Mama!

Okay, so I try to stay off the celebrity bandwagon, because I live in LA and, well, it can get a little tedious (not the celebs themselves -- hey, it's a living -- but the constant chatter about their whereabouts). But Angelina has certainly done good for us hot mamas. First she doesn't push her first kiddies around in a stroller, then she looks good pregnant, then she looks good pregnant with twins (hey, she's following in my twin pregnancy footsteps), and now she's on the cover of W nursing one of the twins. (See a great post about her here, followed by some half-assed comments about why women shouldn't nurse in public.)

Why does this matter? Because in today's world, visibility is everything. Just knowing something is possible for someone else makes it more so for you. I planned on nursing my twins, but everyone said that I'd have to supplement, and even though I was pretty sure I understood the biology, meeting one-year old, exclusively breastfed twins in my doctors office buoyed my resolve. When I hauled my nursing babies all over LA, Jamaica, Wyoming, Marta's Vineyard and Lord knows where else I've gone in the past three years, people would often approach to tell me that they didn't know it was possible to nurse multiples. So the more we appear in public (just quietly doing our thing), the more we inspire future mothers. And I think Angelina (& Brad) just may be inspiring future fathers, as well. Run out and buy the issue and send the publishers a love note, to cancel out all the whining. I'm sure Barbara Walters is cancelling her subscription as we speak.

The funny part is, even W doesn't understand what a hot mama is. Check this out, a poll where they actually ask people to vote which Angelina they like better -- the badass babe or the earth mother. Hello? Why not both? Why do people continue to think that a woman who cares to nurse and be attached to her children can only be a crunchy, granola, hippie? Not that there's anything wrong with that, but there are La Leche League members who paint their nails. Like me.

Peace out, from your fellow Badass Babe Earth Mother!

A Letter To A New Mother (What Not To Say)

A friend of ours had a baby last week, and when I sat down to write her a card, I realized how many things people say to new moms that aren't helpful or true, and vowed to never say these things again. Truth be told, some of them are actual quotes of things that were said to me:

1. Aren't you totally in love with your baby?
2. How are you sleeping?
3. We're going to Starbucks -- wanna come?
4. Let me hold him!
5. Oh, I washed my hands this morning.
6. You're not breastfeeding in here, are you?
7. Which one is the good one? (when I had twins)
8. Ouch!! That's why I would want a c-section/epidural/home birth!

Let's think, for a moment, of what a new mother could actually be feeling in the first weeks and months after she's given birth. In all likelihood, not great. Or maybe fabulous. But you won't know unless you ask, and give permission to mama to let you know what you might not be predisposed to hear.

1. That whole instant-mother-love myth can, in fact, be a myth. And if you don't feel so into your baby, like I didn't, it can feel extra crappy for people to keep pointing out your lack of maternal instincts and feelings. Far better to offer a gentle opening -- "What an amazing little being. You guys are going to get to know each other so well. You know, I even have a friend (okay to fib) who said it took a couple weeks to really connect with her baby. Everyone's different."
2. People are obsessed with your sleep. Often it's because it's the only thing they remember about the early days if they have children, or the only thing they've heard if they don't. It's none of your business, and not helpful at all to focus on it. Try this instead -- "The best part about being with a newborn is how time makes no sense. Ditch the clock and sleep when baby sleeps. Did you know sleeping through the night is defined as five consecutive hours? So don't stress about it. Stay in your pjs for the next forty days, if you can."
3. This last-minute invite thing is going to come up a lot. Sometimes from childless friends, sometimes from friends with older kids, and sometimes from friends with full-time nannies. I know that part of it is because you still think of the new mom as her former self, but she can't really get up and go on a dime. So if the old gang is heading out for lattes and leaving her behind, offer to bring her takeout or just be quiet about it.
4. The baby is cute, I know, but he/she just came out of someone's womb. Sometimes that womb feels a little empty, and it can be weird to watch your newborn passed around to all assembled. If other people are nuzzling your baby, it can feel like your services are no longer needed. (That's why it's great for new moms to nurse -- they have a reason to get baby back. So if you do get to hold the baby, give him or her right back.
5. Wash them again.
6. Wherever here is -- hospital room, living room, car -- is where the new mom is stuck for now, and however she gave birth, moving around might be a tad uncomfortable. So if you have issues with breasts, make yourself scarce. And, by the way, babies signal their need to nurse by opening their little mouths like baby birds and rooting around. By the time they're crying, it's too late. Pay attention, and let mom know it's okay to feed her baby.
7. I almost have no words, and that's pretty unusual. :) How about never, ever asking a parent of twins to differentiate them based on value judgements? Not even, which one talks more, or any personality trait they could take on. Just offer, a simple, "God bless you. That's amazing to have two/three/four infants at once." Leave out the "I don't know how you do it" -- she doesn't either!
8. If the mother feels like sharing her birth story with you, hear it, and reflect on what she's said, so matter how scary or against your personal biases it may be. Because, guess what? That's the birth she had, and telling the story is how she processes it and makes peace with it. If something seems to upset her, you almost can't be wrong by saying, "that's not at all unusual." We all just want to hear that we did our best.

My favorite things to hear as a new mother?

• "What can I get you to eat?"
• "May I make the beds?"
• "Where's your washer and dryer?"
• "You hold the baby -- I'll take your toddler/dogs out for a walk"
• And, the all-time winner, after all of the above have been said, "Lie down/have a shower/I'll let myself out."

Oh, one last thing. I've had four babies. I thought they were all pretty amazing looking when I met them (except for one). When I look back at the pictures, though, the truth is that most babies are pretty hideous. So lie. (I had someone actually say to me that my baby looked better in person than in the photos I'd sent her -- what?).

"The baby's beautiful, and so are you."

It's Not Hot If You're Not Comfortable!

Monica Corcoran wrote a great article in today's LA Times in which she bemoans the fact that the last bastion of the sit-around-the-house-and-get-fat-school, pregnancy, has been taken over by the uber stylish. It was pretty funny, but it raised an important point for you hot mamas out there -- hot is never being uncomfortable or unlike yourself. Nothing is unsexier than a woman sexing herself up when she doesn't want to. That's what makes our OHM philosophy so great -- it's all about being yourself when you're pregnant or the mother of an infant.

And that, sometimes, feels like the hardest trick of all. But bon-bons on the couch in sweats when you're a week away from delivery? Count me in!

Don't Buy These Maternity Clothes

Every once in a while I make a mistake (my husband would say this happens much more often than I admit). And here's one you may benefit from. One Hot Mama is supposed to have clothes for mamas that are unlike other mothers. Moms who are trying to stay in touch with their pre-mom selves. And when we do that, we try to carry really high-quality, feel-great stuff since we're selling online and you trust us to get the stuff you'd choose if you were in a store. But I also try to get affordable stuff, and that's where I made my mistake -- I chose some stuff that was a little too affordable. As in, you get what you pay for. So these outfits are still cute and fun to wear, but I don't think you'll be passing them down for more than 1 or 2 friends.

So, buy them for yourself this pregnancy, but don't be thinking posterity! :)

Jumper and Mock Turtle
Skirt and Top
This Season's Sweater
Long-Sleeve Mesh Top

This last one's actually really well made, but I need to move 'em out!
Denim Skirt

Shop well -- and I promise, there won't be any future mistakes. Okay, maybe a couple ... :)

Danger: Maternity Clothes Now Too Hot!!

What? How can there be danger associated with stretchy clothing designed to cover and accentuate a gargantuan beer belly? Where's the harm in dresses cut two inches longer in front? Can you be hurt by a sequinned tankini with ruching on the side?

No, it's worse than that. You could be seduced into ... getting pregnant again! We started One Hot Mama when our first baby was one, and focused on all things nursing. But two years later, when I "fell pregnant" (I love that expression, from my South African friends) with his sister, we added maternity to our offerings. Because we're a family business, I was the main model, so I was photographed in every stage of pregnancy, wearing fabulous clothes. After having a boy and a girl, we thought we were through. But God laughed, and I fell into that pregnancy thing again, this time with twins. This time, a maternity business came in really handy, because I grew out of my maternity clothes by the end of the first trimester!

Now the girls are three and I thought I was done. Body's mostly back, except for my breasts, which have, apparently, fled the country. They've left before, and their (temporary) return was part of the reason my husband was overjoyed that we were having twins. So their lack, coupled with how darned cute the clothes I'm buying for spring (you girls are so lucky to be able to shop at One Hot Mama this year!) have made me, well, a little broody (English friend's expression for wanting babies).

While you're in it, you may be focused on all the negatives, but there really is nothing so miraculous as having a little human inside your body, and to watch that evidence growing. All that plus not having to do ab workouts make me pine for the days when I filled out my Perfect Pants a little better. Yep, those great maternity pants have been with me post-baby, through a twin pregnancy, and are still my go-to black pants. So having a fifth baby would solve all my wardrobe and Itty Bitty Titty Committee problems. Of course, we couldn't afford to stay in our house, so maybe I'll just have to live vicariously through you guys!

What You Can Learn From Amy Poehler, Sarah Palin and SNL

I know what you're thinking ... you're wondering how I can turn a hotly contested presidential election into a discourse about maternity fashion, aren't you? Hey, you're supposed to write what you know, and I know being pregnant! So might you, if you're reading this. As an actress, my biggest (sartorial) issue during most of my pregnancies was -- how do I hide this? If you think it's important for you to hide signs of pregnancy at your corporate job, imagine a job in which you're interviewing all the time for another position, and more than half of your job description has to do with how you look?

Sure, you say, but tell me again what this has to do with Sarah Palin and Amy Poehler? If you watched Saturday Night Live's last two sketches with the inimitable Tina Fey as Palin, you couldn't help but notice that her partner in crime was, well, greatly with child. And that she was playing women, Hillary Clinton and Katie Couric, who have not been pregnant in quite a while. While I certainly admire her ability to still stay awake for a late-night broadcast at this stage in her pregnancy, I'd like to offer a few suggestions for minimizing the bump.

• Take a page from Governor Palin's book during her unannounced pregnancy with Trig -- all black on the inside (pants and tops) and structured, colourful jackets on top. And don't ever button the jacket -- use a non-maternity top and let its shape appear to be your shape, while the light is absorbed by the swath of absorbent black fabric on your belly.
• Accessories, accessories, accessories. Put 'em up by your face and make 'em colourful.
• Posture counts. For heaven's sake, if you lean forward, it looks like someone just heaved you a medicine ball.
• Distraction -- think legs and cleavage. If we can see those (and by we, I mean men) we will be too dazzled by bare skin to notice that pot belly.
• Keep your face on. Now is not the time to go barefaced, even if that's your usual look -- your skin is thinner and all sorts of funky lines and spots are making their appearances for the duration. And even if you carry your pregnancy weight primarily in the belly, some of up will creep into your face. Mascara and eyeliner will help counteract that.
• Carry things -- Bristol Palin carried baby Trig, Elaine from Seinfeld always had a magazine or purse in front of her. By the way, this works wonders after baby's born, too, and is yet another plus for using a baby sling instead of a stroller. When I was seven months pregnant with my first baby, I filmed a love scene standing behind an actor. Of course, that didn't even make sense, physically, but he was the only thing big enough to cover my girth!
• For more How To Dress During Pregnancy tips, check this out.

By the way, I really hope that these tips aren't used to hide your pregnancy from your prom date, parents or teachers in middle school. Everyone else, use away!

Pregnancy Shopping Lists

You know how every single baby magazine and website seems to have a "complete list" of everything you "need" to buy with a new baby? They're kinda helpful, but a lot of those things are definitely optional -- a $900 stroller? Really? How about a $60 sling, instead?

Well, we have a list or two here at One Hot Mama, but they're decidedly optional. All you need for your new baby are breasts (even just one will work fine) or an alternate milk supply, a car seat, diapers and some magical way to get more sleep. Okay, maybe earplugs.

But what about me? You wail. My body is being taken over by an alien. I hear that milk is going to come out of my previously perky breasts! And not just when bidden to do so! And every body part is going to stretch and gain weight and lose weight and still be stretchy. Never fear, Roxanne and One Hot Mama are here! Check out our various shopping lists for the newly pregnant, the about to burst, and the long-time nursers. See, even though we have a store and are ostensibly running a business to make a profit, I can't do that by guilting or shaming you into spending money. I love smart shopping, so use these lists as a starting point and go from there. We'll help you adapt your regular wardrobe for pregnancy and nursing, and winnow down the ridiculous number of choices of hot maternitywear down to the coolest and best.

And, in this economy, you'll appreciate that we're doing that in a very affordable way. (Although I also hate when magazines label some pair of $150 shoes affordable. I try to keep every One Hot Mama piece under $100 -- I break that rule only for truly cool stuff!)

One Hot Mama's Mission

As I've mentioned, my handsome husband Bob and I are in the midst of revamping One Hot Mama, which took a back burner to having four kids in eight years (hey, cut a girl a little slack!) and I found the coolest thing yesterday. We wrote this ten years ago, and, I'm happy to say, it's still true today:

One Hot Mama is in the business of making women feel great about parenting during its most self-image-challenging times -- pregnancy, early motherhood, and lactation. The changes to their bodies during these times means that our customers are eager to look and feel good. One Hot Mama believes the two go hand-in-hand, and thus aims to carry, design and sell the best selection of clothes that make breaskfeeding simple and discreet while helping mom look great, and that make maternity style an attainable goal for women who can't -- or won't -- spend $350 on a dress they'll wear for four months.

Most women are aware that "breast is best" but the real world often intervenes. Not many American women want to expose themselves in front of the in-laws, much less at the mall or at work. Often options are limited to awkward canopies or scarves, and some downright ugly clothes. At One Hot Mama, they not only get the tools they need to be mobile again, they get support and advice and humour. We serve our customers' needs not only for material goods, but for reassurance in their parenting and attractiveness. In doing so, we aim to be a profitable company, both in dollars and in helping babies get the best food on earth.

I hope you think we're doing our job well. Please comment or write us to let us know what you think, and where we could improve. Now, help keep my four kids awash in groceries (man, you don't appreciate the savings of nursing until they're weaned!) -- by shopping!

Have a great day!

One Hot Mama Is Hotter Than Ever

My dear husband, partner and webmaster -- oh, and father of our four aweseome kids -- Bob Hoge, has just completed a redesign of our website, One Hot Mama. I gotta say, the guy is good!

Thanks, honey. You're One Cool Papa!

How to Nurse in Public, aka How to Leave The House With Your Baby

Just found another mama's blog that had a post about someone being asked to cover up while nursing in public. While I get that others (especially men, and Barbara Walters) may feel a little "where should I look?" when they encounter a nursing mom, I find it odd that people get so worked up about babies doing what they do.

It's a sin that our culture is so uptight that you’ll be asked to leave a room while breastfeeding, but you’ll never be asked to leave that same establishment if you hit your child. Go figure. Someone else, somewhere else, said the most helpful thing you can do to advocate breastfeeding is simply to nurse everywhere. So I did. And I mean, everywhere. I pride myself on the fact that even friends who thought I was a freak for nursing a toddler (much less twin toddlers!) commented on how they were never visually offended (thanks … I think).

If you have a question about the actual law in your state (or, more importantly, the state where your in-laws live), look no further. Personally, if my kid's hungry, there's no law that could stop me from feeding her. The important thing to remember is, though, that breastfeeding is not against the law. In the United States, anyway.

But, two factors point the way to discretion for nursing moms. One is to stop cretins from acting, well, cretinous. The other is that most of us don't want our breasts exposed. We just want to nourish our nurslings without attracting gawkers. To that end, I've compiled some helpful hints for the seemingly revolutionary and dreaded act of breastfeeding your baby while outside your house. Read the entire article here.

My fave nursing story took place in 2002, when I was in the midst of whole house renovation and my second baby was not yet two. My general contractor, a burly, tough guy in his late 60s, one day started blushing and said something about it being unseemly to be nursing in front of people like I was (fyi, I was completely covered up). I had to laugh. Why? Because it was 7:00 am, and he was in my bedroom letting the tile guys into the bathroom. Public, indeed! :)

How to Dress When You're Pregant, or How Not to Buy Maternity Clothes

What? Advice on how not to buy maternitywear from someone who's selling them? Have I gone mad? Well, okay, that mental health thing is a separate issue, but I can tell you that you don't need to replace your entire wardrobe. Sure, a lot of stuff won't fit you now, soon, or even ever, but that doesn't mean that looking hot during your pregnancy should cost you an arm and a leg.

First of all, count your lucky stars that you're pregnant now, and not even ten years ago. Then, the ubiquitous maternity overalls were just starting to fall out of favour, but most of what you could buy (even at then-on-the-cutting edge Pea in the Pod) looked like a tent. With ribbons to tie the excess in the back. There's now almost too many options for hip, hot maternity clothing. So what's a girl to do?

First, watch this -- it's one of an eleven-part series on maternity dressing that I taped for Expert Village -- how not to dress when you're pregnant!

Second, trust me (I'm nothing if not brutally frank!) to buy the best pieces out there to mix in with your clothes and the cheap throwaways from Target and your high-end Chaiken pants. We've just done the ordering for spring, and those of you due in 2009 will look hot to trot!

In the meantime, check out our current offererings -- they're changing every day. To make it easy, look at our Shopping List feature and choose Shopping for the Newly & Solidly Pregnant.

Happy shopping! :)

Slings and Things

Ever since the first time I saw a woman put on her Baby Bjorn, I swore I would never use one. I was pregnant at the time, and I watched, fascinated, as she got out of her car and began buckling and strapping and adjusting while her baby fussed. Finally, she got him in there, and all I could think of was a marionnette! All that was missing was a string to pull his little legs even further apart.

Pretty soon after that, I found Dr. William Sears' Baby Book, and that helped form me as a mother. I went hunting for a sling, and ended up with the only one you could buy in a store back then, which was, I think, called the NoJo baby carrier -- it had some goofy script print and was meagerly padded, but I wore it into the ground. From there, I discovered the Over The Shoulder Baby Holder and for a long time, it was the only carrier that we carried at OHM.

Then I met the great gals who designed the Ultimate Baby Wrap, and I loved how it acted like a Bjorn but was as comfy as a sling, so now we sell that as well. Then, at a pregnancy trade show (yeah, there is such a thing. How my life has changed!), I met the creator of the sleek, hip Hotslings line, and she told me that One Hot Mama had actually had inspired her to start her business. How could I resist? :)

And now, life has come full circle. Dr. Sears (and his large family) actually designed a new sling that has the feature I used to dream about -- a pocket!!! The Balboa Baby Sling also comes in dreamy, non-goofy colours. Awesome.

It's so great to see these carriers out and about these days. I mean, you can nurse in private and shop at the same time; if you're at home, you can shovel in some food without leaving your crying infant on the floor; your hands are free for your other child (or, in my case, other children); and, best of all, if you have twins (I did!) you can wear two slings bandolier style and carry both babies hands free! I never was one for a stroller with a singleton -- except to schlepp my gear. (I was always afraid I would miss the signs of choking or something.)

Let me know what you think. What's your fave way to wear your baby? Have you dropped him/her yet? (Hint: Always be sure there's fabric between your body and baby's when using a sling! Learned that one the hard way.)

Have a great day!

What A Difference A Decade Makes

Bob and I are in the process of redesigning our site, and ordering tons of fab new fashions and finds for fall (how alliterative!). In the process, I came across this gem of a Q&A from another mama:

Q: When I am going to get my life back?

A: When we stopped laughing, we realized how important this was to you. Sorry to tell you, but it’s going to take about a year. Yes, after a year as a mother you will realize that you’re not ever going to get your life back. This is not, however, a bad thing. Your new life will be better than you ever imagined. And harder, and more emotional, and filled with more love than before. I tried to act as if I was one of those women who could birth the baby in the field and keep harvesting grain like nothing had happened. I went back to auditioning (not the most confidence-boosting of ways to spend your time) when Cameron was three weeks old. Take my advice. That was stupid. Rest as long as you can. I spent the first six months of his life trying to get away, to do stuff I used to do. I can’t tell you how frustrating it was to be mid-bikini wax and get a phone call from the babysitter with a wailing infant in the background. But know what? I’m a mom now. And so are you. And the sooner you accept that fact, the sooner the life you have will be better. I promise.

Scarily, I wrote that in 1998! And it has taken the better part of that decade to get me back into the drivers seat here at One Hot Mama. Now, I certainly have been a little busy (four kids in eight years is a little brutal, especially when the last two are twins!) and I did manage to work in between, but let's use this week as an example -- my husband and I met a bunch of friends for cocktails at a trendy, no-sign-outside bistro, we had a series of meetings about our business, I filmed a (small) part for a show airing this fall, and all our kids are fed and happy. Those things haven't happened all at once for ten years!

My point is that you need to cut yourself some slack. Yeah, you -- whether you're on your first baby our your third, or even if you're a dad. Pay attention to your family at all, and other things may slide. But that's okay. It's kinda like Chutes & Ladders (or Snakes & Ladders) -- get near the finish line, get pregnant again, and you slide right back to the start.

Enjoy the ride. :)

Baby Wearing Q&A

Here's a typical question we get at One Hot Mama:

I have a 2 month old who I am trying to put in my hotsling, but it always seems that her chin is pressing to her chest, no matter how I put her in there. Is there a way to correct this problem?

And here's the answer:

First of all -- congratulations on the birth of your baby! You've survived the first two months, which I remember passing in a total fog! Now, on to the Hotsling. A 2-month-old baby is still really floppy, and has spent more of her life (in utero) completely folded in on herself. So her chin touching her chest isn't really a cause for concern, unless you think she's cutting off her air supply! But I'm willing to bet that when you look at the Hotslings wearing videos all the babies you see holding their heads up will actually be old enough to sit up unassisted. If you scootch her butt forward so she's in a prone position, her head will fall away from her chest. But if you hip carry her, that heavy head has nowhere to go but forward. Now you can happily purchase your hip Hotsling at our website.

Why is this worthy of a post, you may ask? One point bears repeating: Just as most maternity designers use women who are only 5 or 6 months pregnant to model their clothes -- because it looks better -- infant manufacturers use babies who are 4-6 months old. They aren't as slack-jawed and floppy as newborns. Now, you may think your newborn is different. I certainly did. And guess what? When I look back at his pictures (from ELEVEN years ago! ) and those of his three sisters, I see four kids who grew up to be cute, but whose photos I wouldn't use to sell half-priced poopy diapers! So don't compare your newborn to the images you see everywhere of non-newborn babies. Lastly, and this is what really gets my goat, don't expect things to happen before their time. Babies are not developmentally able to sit until around 6 months, and even great, steady head control doesn't happen until around the 4th month, so enjoy your rag doll while you can. :)

Have a great day -- oh, and we're clearing out a lot of our great maternity and nursing clothes to make room for new stuff. Check it out!

One Is The Hardest Number

Now that I am trailed by four little children wherever I go, it seems to be de rigeur for other mothers I encounter to say, "I don't know how you do it!" Don't get me wrong -- I understand what's behind the comment. Part compliment, part envious jab, the overwhelming subtext is, "No way I could be in your shoes -- I can barely handle my life with one baby!"

But here's the dirty little secret I didn't learn until I was about halfway into my ten straight years of gestating and lactating -- the first baby is the hardest one! Think about it -- what if you went to your job and every week, the tasks were different, so you were constantly learning and just when you got good at something, you got moved to a new department? First-time mommyhoood is just like that. Well, except for your supervisor is a bald, drooling bundle of fat that eats and poops constantly, and when he/she is mad at you, screams like a proverbial stuck pig. If you only have one child (which you may have very good reasons for doing) you will never get to use this wealth of knowledge on another kid.

So for me, putting my infant twins (third and fourth children) on a plane by myself to travel from Los Angeles to Wyoming (changing planes in Denver) took one tenth the energy of trying to wrestle my firstborn into my car to visit his cousins for his first Halloween -- across town!

My point? When you're all sweaty and harried and unsure of yourself and you see a hot mama trailed by several offspring, don't think, "man, I couldn't handle that!" Instead, know that I say, "I don't know how you do it!"

Hang in there, baby! :)